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When and how to start talking

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What the research shows

Parent–child communication

Here’s what the research into parent–child communication shows6:

Communication is best when parents are clear and direct AND listen to their children’s views and welcome questions.
Many parents truly expect their children will come to them when they have questions, but children also expect (and want) parents to start these conversations.
Fear that parents will judge them stops young people raising the topic of sex (“If they’re talking about it, they’re doing it!”).
Grandparents, aunts, uncles, older siblings and other carers can be very helpful as an alternative or extra source of information and support.
If a child has shared that they are same-sex attracted or transgender it can be extremely upsetting to them if the parent never brings up the subject again.

One way of showing a child that they are loved and accepted is to send the message that it’s OK to talk.
More research needs to be done into how parents can support the healthy sexual development of kids who are gender diverse and sexually diverse.
More research needs to be done into how parents can support the healthy sexual development of children born with intersew variations.
More research needs to be done into how praents can support healthy sexual development in children with cognitive differences such a Autism.

I feel really honoured that she is able to come to me with this. I don’t have all the answers, but I can help her find out.

Parent of girl 17

Speech bubble Conversation starter:
Here is Auntie's ultrasound. Isn't it amazing?
She's going to be a great parent.
What age do you think a person is ready to be a parent? What do you think are the qualities that a parent should have?